The Jerk is CricketSoda’s famous attempt at satire. We work hard to make you laugh, but we claim no responsibility for liquids that might come out your nose and cause damage to your computer.
by: Levi Blackman on April 24, 2008 · no commentsFeatured, Humor, The Jerk (satire) Community Minor Roquel Goro, a 13 year old minor that does nothing but get into trouble, learned the hard way today that pulling out doesn't work. Goro and his girlfriend ... Read More >>
by: Levi Blackman on April 7, 2008 · no commentsFeatured, Humor, The Jerk (satire) According to eye-witnesses on the scene the G-X-4800, massive water cooled gaming platform, that belongs to local gamer John Bo Jovia is no longer considered Jovia's best friend after freezing ... Read More >>
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by: Levi Blackman on November 17, 2007 · 1 commentFeatured, Humor, Major Motion Pictures Brandon's soul must be saved, and we are here to rescue him. Video originally released March 14, 2006, and known in the close circle of friends as the Brandon slapping ... Read More >>
It’s been a long time since we’ve written. We still don’t have a phone, so that’s why we haven’t called. As soon as I convince your father that the telephone has in fact been invented, you will be the first person I call. Please include your telephone address in your response. How are things going? I hope you are doing well. Your sister tells me that you are a writer now. How exciting! She mailed me some magazines with your articles in them. I must admit that your father and I were a bit concerned when we read about your latest invention son. “Old People Huts” designed to “house elderly family members when they become very ill or overly annoying” just seems a bit wrong Mark. After reading that, your father told me to unplug the phone as he was expecting the media to call and ask questions about you. I had to remind him that we don’t have a telephone. Read more >>
After a hiatus of dancing (I pulled my Glutoid-o-Mastus)I am proud to present Dance Levi Dance 3. I have mastered a few new moves! Please let me know what you think, and as always, please send in any suggestions you have so I can improve my dancing. I have come a long way thanks to all you out there, and can’t wait to better my own dancing. Read more >>
(Satire Disclaimer) According to local eye witness reports a “Slim Jim,” or a really skinny guy dressed up like Uncle Sam, was used to bust well known prostitute “Lady Liberty.” Miss Liberty had been running a prostitute ring for over a year, and have developed a brand known as “The Night of Liberation.” Police report that with this bust, there a no longer an costume wearing prostitutes left in the city. Read more >>
My dad always taught me that when a flock of birds fly over your head, the last thing you want to do is look up. Unfortunately for this guy, his father must not have loved him.
It is dangerous to be a news reporter in these scary and trying times.
I will be presenting stories from time to time that my nine year old son wrote. No, this is not some gag, they were really written by him. I’m not the kind of parent that puts those retarded “My Son Blah Blah” stickers on their cars, but this kid isn’t half bad. So without further ado, I hereby present to you the first ever published piece from the satire and humor child prodigy, Mark Garrison Jr. Read more >>
Subject: The rest of my life From: Your FORMER corporate slave Date: First day of the rest of my life! To: FORMER captor (Tom in logistics)
They say that a man can only be so lucky, but I received the most important emails of my life today. Not only am I being personally requested to handle an $80,000,000 inheritance transaction for a cocoa/gold/oil farm widower from Congo, but I have been randomly selected out of over 500,000,000 emails to receive Norway’s biggest lump sum lottery prize of over $75,000,000,000,000. I’M RICH BIOTCH! Read more >>
Local man Rodney Mcparkerson resolved to enjoy life more this year. The past few years have been hard on Mcparkerson, and he has become more depressed, leaving the house less and sleeping the days away. He wanted a new fresh start, so he could actually do something with his life instead of sulk in his bedroom. Sadly, after only three days of the new year, Mcparkerson has broken his New Years Resolution, and has locked himself in his room watching reruns of Mash. Read more >>
Due to the fact that people really don’t care what they are watching on the news as long as it is mindless are causing Journalists everywhere to just give up trying to find the hard biting stories and just report about cute things. Today’s top stories, Cousin’s Save Dog from Ocean, Pet Tigers, and Grandma Saved from Reindeer. Read more >>
LOS ANGELES — The impact of a strike by porn writers was still not very evident, even as the strike entered its tenth year. While production on approximately twelve adult films was stopped due to the strike, both the porn industry and the porn watching community are barely able to tell that anything has changed. Read more >>
Santa Claus, working under the corporate name Santa Inc., announced a complete outsourcing of his main Christmas functions to India-based Duhandi Retail Services. Calls to Santa’s North Pole headquarters on Monday were met with a voice mail message. (Actual voice mail recording) Read more >>