I remember, not to long ago, that a revolution was in the making. It seemed like that is all anyone could talk about. The time had come to make drastic changes to the way we live life, and the future would be bright because of it. Our apathy had worn off, and we had taken charge of our destiny. We were tired of being told that we were free, while we were so thirsty for a sip of pure freedom.
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I figured out why no one laughs at this one joke that I thought was hilarious, and my dad thinks in hilarious, but than no one else on the planet thinks in funny. The joke is, when someone is having a hard time saying something, you but in a say “That’s easy for you to say!” in a kinda offended tone. I usually follow it with loud chuckles that yields strange looks from everyone around me.
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I wish everyone a happy Thanksgiving this year. Recently, times have been a little hard and I don’t get to eat as much as I should, and I am looking forward to eating as much as I possibly can without getting sick. I feel like it is wrong though if you do all this thanking and don’t even realize what you are truly being thankful for.
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I find it very hard to believe that Peyton Manning has fans. He can throw a dead pig to his blockhead homeboys and despite the fact I love Football more than my wife, that is a very fucking nugatory talent. I hate splitting hairs, but the point I’m trying to make is that this witless penisface crybaby needs to get the fuck out of my television. Take some lessons in tact from Sir Tom Brady, and stop using your “talent” to sell me stupid fucking credit card and cell phone bullshit. Watch this commercial:
Payton Manning at his most invidious worst.
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In my world the customer is always right, but it is all just an act to keep my perfect business rating. Especially in the Freelance marketplace, where the person best at selling themselves always seems to win even if they have no idea what they are doing. The man keeps me down like this, even though I am doing something I enjoy (which is more than most people), just because that is the way our new rating based society works. One mark against your record could hurt business, keep you from buying a car, and make you flunk school. All my customers are just people, individuals doing business, trying to accomplish something, but they have been conditioned by society.
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School has started, and with that many crazy times to be had by all. This year though, seems more uneventful, with little going on other than studying and flute playing. Many players and pimps, usually partying it up this time of year, blame the apathetic hippies who just want to sit around on the streets talking all types of crazy “shiznit.”
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It is that time of year again. In the good old days I would have to lock myself in my room and wait for all my friends to get it out of their system. These days I just accept the fact that my friends are actually all pirates reincarnated in modern human bodies. It is a surprise that they haven’t taken over the workplace by force, making the boss walk the plank. Anyways, have fun talking like a pirate, but make sure you get your lunch order correct, because these days, not many people speak pirate.
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I was late for swim aerobics. Let’s get that out of the way right now. So I was a little flustered when I was trying to hail a cab. I loved my swim aerobics class because it brought together three things I lived for - swimming, aerobics, and Steve, the instructor. Steve was wonderful. I loved him, really. He didn’t know it then but he did the week following when I told him in the locker room. He blushed but told me he was already taken by a set designer who worked off-Broadway doing irreverent shows about the Amish.
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(satire disclaimer) Las Vegas - Federal health officials decided on Wednesday to approve the “morning-before pill,” a controversial new form of birth control for over the counter sales.
The new pill, known as Plan-B-Minus will also be available for girls 8 to 17 years old without the need for a doctor’s excuse.
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He’s more than an actor, you know. He’s an author, too. He writes novels for us Gen X-ers. Books about roustabout dudes and the girls they love but can’t hold onto. Books filled with booze, and brawls, and babes with boobs. So I was intrigued when I heard he’d be giving a reading at a bookstore downtown. I got tickets to hear him read, maybe get his autograph for my little sister who had loved him ever since he played that wimpy boy on “Dead Poet’s Society.”
I went with my girlfriend, Chloe, who didn’t think one thing or the other on Ethan Hawke other than he had a striking resemblance to Chip, the guy who served her coffee every morning at Latte Da on Westchester Avenue.
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