Sigh, look at you. It always seems to come to this, another excuse, another reason just like all the others but in the end you are just putting off what is important to you. Why would you put so much effort into other things, and not your passion? Shouldn’t the passion come first, and things like sleep and food come second? Isn’t that what the American Dream is all about these days; working your ass off at whatever you love until it kills you?

Instead of just drawing out some excuse about me being tired or having to work my ass off during the week just to pay the god damn bills, I am going to reflect on all the badass shit going on right now that I should have been writing about this whole time. I should be publishing daily if I ever want to get where I want to go.

First, it was Brandon’s birthday Monday, and it was one of the first birthdays in Denton, Texas that didn’t involve jail, vomit, or any of the normal birthday vexes (although it did rain as usual). Overall, the experience was enjoyable for all, down to the chicken Parmesan sandwiches.

Second, I have my own place. For the first time in my life I am living on my own out in the big scary world. The place itself is amazing; 2 bedrooms on two floors with more room than I have ever had. My neighbors are bad ass and are always doing something fun. The rent is cheap and the location is even better. It is more than I could ever ask for in a place (except a in ground heated pool would be nice.)

Third, I have a job for the first time in a very long while. I am doing it mainly for the insurance. I know I could probably make it on my own just doing website stuff, but being diabetic and not having insurance in pretty much a death sentence in a country as screwed up as ours. The job sucks, the hours are long, and it is kicking my ass. But, I am learning a very valuable lesson on work ethic, and getting things done, and when I finally quit this job it will be a great day. I will be a stronger person for it, and hopefully have a little operating capital saved up so I can really pursue my dreams.

So I need to promise myself, at this point, like I have many times before, that I will make the effort, every single fucking day, if I have to work or not, to write, to learn, to perfect my art. I am going to have to be one bad ass mutha to compete in this world, especially on my own. So lets start acting like one.