(satire disclaimer) In a shocking development, it has been reported to the popular and always factual TMZ that the unborn fetus inside the belly of young child star Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant.

While both biologically and scientifically impossible, vagina doctors at two different hospitals have confirmed that Spears’ unborn fetus is with child.

It has been reported that the fetus decided on its own to take a pregnancy test while in the womb and the results were positive.

When asked how an unborn fetus gained access to a pregnancy test, Jamie Lynn Spears reportedly answered, “Hey, if Brittney can give her kids alcohol and crack, I think I can give my unborn fetus a pregnancy test.”

While it is unclear how Jamie Lynn administered the test, sources close to insanity state that she “forced it through her belly button until it hit something squishy.”

Doctors we spoke with who wished to remain anonymous because they’re not really doctors said that while highly improbable, a fetus being pregnant is no more strange than a 16 year old child actor not using birth control.

We attempted to contact the California Department of Child Safety for comment but we encountered a voice mail message that led us to believe we got the wrong phone number.

Many people are not surprised by the news. One Jamie Lynn Spears fan that we spoke with stated, “It only makes sense. A super absorbent towel that is so strong it can soak up a case of cola.” After asking for clarification, we realized she was watching an infomercial and not the news about Spears.

We tried to reach Jamie Lynn Spears’ fetus for comment but there was a tampon in the way.

When we contacted 19 year old Casey Aldridge, the reported father of Jamie Lynn Spears’ baby, and asked him what he thought about his unborn son or daughter being pregnant, he responded by explaining how he had warned Spears about having sex while being pregnant. “I told her! I told her that doing cooshy cooshy while being preggers would put a baby in the baby!” After his comment, Aldridge immediately climbed back in his Power Wheels and sped off.

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