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Slim Jim Used in Prostitution Bust of Lady Liberty

by: Levi Blackman

lady_liberty.jpg(Satire Disclaimer) According to local eye witness reports a “Slim Jim,” or a really skinny guy dressed up like Uncle Sam, was used to bust well known prostitute “Lady Liberty.” Miss Liberty had been running a prostitute ring for over a year, and have developed a brand known as “The Night of Liberation.” Police report that with this bust, there a no longer an costume wearing prostitutes left in the city.


“I usually see her when I am coming home from work,” local blacksmith Donald Requie said. “I thought about stopping a few times but I don’t know. I’m not really that patriotic, and I think the whole role playing thing would be a little over the top for me. I am into the basic stuff, like maids and doctors.”

Many are sad to see the flair leave the city.

“She was an ugly heefer anyways.” Street racer Jose McJose said. “No body would ever pick her up so I don’t really know why she could be a problem. You know, it was kind of fun because she would count down the traffic light all excited. Great for our street races!”

Even people from the 6th Church of Good Feelings said they would miss the sights, even though sin levels are at an all time low.

“Sometimes Jesus tests us with temptation.” Susanna Laburger said. “I like the easy temptations like prostitutes. Lets me show the lord just how much I love him without having bend my ass over backwards and letting him stick bananas in my bum.”

Not to worry, people of this fair city. She will be out in two months, and hopefully back on the street entertaining all those who pass.

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About the Author

Levi Blackman

Levi Blackman Editor in Chief Blue The master and creator of CricketSoda, Levi lives the simple life filled with small adventures and long hours sitting at home telling the tale to millions alike. He spends his days working on his website, and when the chance arrives, on the road seeing the world first hand. He wants to travel, and explore, and as soon as he can clear a check for an airplane, he will be a pilot. He also enjoys film, and is a world famous actor. Right now Levi is working on projects like dentonsoda.com, and is also creating new major motion pictures that will blow the expecting audience away. Late nights and caffine and in the future.

Comments

Mark Garrison said,

February 10, 2008 @ 11:11 pm

“I like the easy temptations like prostitutes. Lets me show the lord just how much I love him without having bend my ass over backwards and letting him stick bananas in my bum.”

Fucking classic.

Master Cricket said,

February 10, 2008 @ 11:43 pm

hehe…

I love Tax time…people come out in costume and give me great material to work with.

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