So for some reason as I was lying in bed, sleeping far longer than I should, I began to wonder about demands from large groups of people. Everyone has demands on them from society, and I can see how some of these demands might conflict with getting into heaven. Does public demand have an effect on your heaven rating? Today, I am willing to sacrifice myself for science. CricketSoda has developed the ultimate test to determine true results.

So I can’t ask straight up for the public to demand something from me. If I ask for it, then for sure it will count against me. So, I am just going to make a suggestion, any you the public will have to use your imagination. For example, maybe I should burn a cross in my living room. If 1000 people told me to do so, and then I did it, we would be on our way to the truth.

After the cross burning, if I went to Hell, well, then I would know. Shit, the public is a bunch of assholes, but all well, anyone have any marshmallows. I could then post via my phone on CricketSoda and you guys could share this knowledge with the world.

So if you want to, and I’m just suggesting this because it is part of the functionality of our website, leave a comment telling me to burn a cross or something. I am asking God right now, to forgive these people, and to respect Internet privacy by allowing these people to remain anonymous.

Also, Digg the shit out of this, because I count diggs as votes.

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